Weekend binge. :[

Now how can i say this?

Last night i drank some lovely vodka...and i plan to do it again tonight.

i feel so at ease with it.

(great im gonna be an alcoholic)

So this weekend has been something...nonstop binging with my friend.

i felt horrible...she doesnt know it but i purged a little bit. even tho she was on my ass all weekend

(yes she followed me into bathrooms.)

But anyways as a result of this weekend im probably 600 pounds and i lost my friend Jeremy...well he was an ass anyways i dyed my hair, and i have finally gotten over the whole i think i lost my period from stress thing.

Though i still havent gotten my period i honestly think i might be prego so my friends sister in law is bringing me a pregnancy test tomorrow after my soccer practice. (Thank god she is so cool!) Its gonna be a little awkward but she told me shes been there so its all good :)

I'm gonna go to the doctors sometime this week too...because my blood pressure spiking and plummeting when it wants scares the bahhhjesus outta me. so hopefully they'll be able to help me with that. i really hope i can turn my life around..

it would be nice. i wanna lose weight the healthy way again...but thats probably until i step on the scale later. ohh jeez. but Jeremy doesnt wanna talk to me anymore because i wouldnt send him a "picture" so whatever his loss i guess. but tomorrow is my start of cleaning up my binges. im gonna start with 1000(maybe) or less. then more down to 800 or less. then 500 then 300. and stay at 300 for a while.

it sounds like a good plan to me. but it probably wont fall through.

BUT I CAN TRY :)

alrighty next on my list is to go clean my room.

then homework...

then maybe i'll do a couple shots of vodka.

i just wanna forget everything again.